Sometime in 2003, I was in Bangalore with my friend Satish Chetty. We just took off to Sravana Belagola, Halebeedu, came back to Bangalore to catch the train. We had some hours to kill. We sat on a bench on MG Road and along came a little girl with some flowers in her hand. She would have been 7-8 years old. She begged me to buy. I don't wear flowers, I don't even believe in giving people cut flowers coz I hate to cut flowers from plants. I said no. She persisted. Please, buy - she said in kannada. I said no, I don't need it. She said please, I am hungry, I can buy milk for my brother. I said no again.
Satish who had gone to look up a friend, came back, overheard our conversation and said, "If you are hungry, we will buy you something." She seemed apprehensive but didn't want to let go off the opportunity. She quickly called another friend of hers. We walked across to somewhere near Gangaram book store. There was a small cart selling ice creams. The kids wanted ice cream and we got it for them. On our way back to the benches on the other side, the kid told me her story. Her father was sick and at home, unemployed. Mom worked somewhere, can't remember now. The kid went to school and in the evenings, came to MG Road along with her older kid friend to sell flowers. Went back home alone. I sat and chatted with her for sometime. Satish took a small video clip of us talking using the camera I had then. I still have the video but some format stuff has changed and I can't see it anymore.
A year later, I was at Devi Theatres on Mount Road in Chennai. Waiting for Sakthi to come so we could see the movie Autograph. We never reached any movie halls on time (we still don't) but this time I was there but waiting for him and he had the tickets too. I was in the parking lot when a 10-12 year old kid came and offered to polish my shoes. I wasn't wearing any. I was wearing something like sandals with cotton strips running across. I said no. These don't need polishing. The kid said Pasikkudhu akka (I am hungry, elder sister). I said, go away. He kept following me around - he had nobody else to go after. I was the only stupid person loitering in the parking lot. I tried getting rid of him but he was persistent. I knew he was very hungry. I said, come with me, I will buy you food.
I walked to a small shop across. There were lots of men trying to buy a cigarette, paan, quick fixes whatever. All that the shopkeeper had was packets of cheese balls - cost about Rs. 10 each. I bought two, gave it to the kid and said sit here and eat. The kid wanted to take it home, but I refused. These kids are usually bullied, adults in the racket snatch it from them, I didn't want that to happen. I said, "Eat in front of me or you lose both." The kid give in, opened a pack and ate at record speed. Satisfied, I went back to loitering. No sign of Sakthi... Five minutes later, I heard a kid wailing like crazy. It was the same boy and he came running to me. "Akka, Akka, help me." I asked him and he told that an older guy had snatched the second packet from him. I was furious. I ran over to him, found it was a 26-year old mute beggar who thought it was easy to terrorize a child. I went and slapped him, snatched back the packet. The guy was shocked and tried gathering support. I screamed at him about what he was trying to do and the crowd that gathered quickly melted away.
Yesterday, Sakthi and I went to Swarna Jayanthi Park at Indirapuram, where our new home is going to be. The park is nice, lots of benches to sit around, very clean and green. Perfect evening spent, we walked out. Carts with various food stuff lined the pavement - roasted chana and peanuts in one, bhel and pani puri in another, fruit chat in yet another, Mother Diary Ice cream in another. We walk towards the bike. One kid came running after us - Bhayyaji, Bhayyaji, ek rupaya de do (Brother, brother, give me 1 rupee). Sakthi was not listening. She came after me. Didiji, didiji, eka rupaya de do (Sister, sister, give me 1 rupee). I stood, smiled at the kid and asked what she would do with 1 rupee. She answered confidently - mein kuch cheez kareedoongi (I will buy something). "What can you buy with 1 rupee?" I asked her. She had no answer. I said, come with me, I will buy you something and you have to eat in front of me, okay? She nodded. Quickly, 5 other children joined. I looked at them and thought about what my friend Satish always tells me. The 10 or 5 odd rupees we give these people mean nothing to us.
I asked her what she wanted - she said, "Didiji, Didiji, chocolate ice cream khila do!" I took her to the cart, asked the guy to give 5 cones although there was a few month-old baby in the arms of another 5-6 year old kid. Gave everybody except the infant. The kid holding the baby asked, what about the baby? I said no, the kid cannot handle cold food. With the kid firmly held on one waist, she was struggling to open the wrapper with one hand. She couldn't. I put my hand out offering to help. She defiantly said no. May be, she was scared, I would snatch it back. She bit into the wrapper and kept at it till it came out. One kid wanted to take it home and I dissuaded her, this is ice cream, will melt, eat it here. After seeing 5 wrappers popped open, I climbed the bike and went home - really happy.
Just half an hour before buying the ice creams, I had seen 2 10-12 year old boys pushing little cars with 4-5 year old kids sitting in them. For the younger kids, this was fun paid for by parents who can't handle the pestering. For the older ones, this was work, a way to keep hunger at bay. All work and no fun. I sat there, feeling very sorry for them.
What is it about these kids that tug our hearts? Is it the irony? That we want the best for ourselves and our own children but somehow are able to walk past childhoods lost on the streets. Every time, I go to Great India Palace Mall in Noida, I see children (the law forbidding under-16 year olds to be employed be damned!), child servants taking care of kids barely a few years younger than them. How can the adults do it? I am a bleeding heart socialist. Sakthi is more practical. "These child servants at least get to eat everyday, better than being exploited on the streets." I see the logic but I hurt every time. As if, it is my personal failure.
I wash my guilt (or at least try to) by trying a few things. When I was in Gurgaon and drove my car a lot, I had a box of biscuits always with me. When begging children swarmed to the car at traffic intersections, I used to give away biscuits. Better than giving money which somebody will snatch. Anytime, a child catches me on the road and asks for money, I take them to a restaurant, shop or cart nearby and buy something to eat. I sit next to them and force them to eat, so adults don't snatch that either. Satish taught me this, "Buy food, don't give money - you don't know where the money will go." When I don't finish my meals at a restaurant, I diligently pack doggy bags, search for somebody hungry and hand over the food.
The Tamil poet Bharathi said "Thani oruvanukku unavu illai enil, jagathinai azhithiduvom." If there is no food for one man, the world shall be destroyed. I can't save the world. But, I can buy chocolate ice cream and cheese balls. It feels good, alright.
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